Okay! We're back to business! What kind of business? Why, Christmas business! And what better than the day before the day before BLACK FRIDAY--oh, ah, that is to say--Thanksgiving. And what are we thankful for? Why, CHRISTMAS, bitches!!!
Now that's not very nice dear readers. Pretend I didn't write that.
Time for a complete reset. It's been such a while that I've worked on this, I think we all (myself included) need to go back and reexamine what we already have. I'm talking like, Square One. So, here we go...
TITLE:
CUMMING HOME FOR CHRISTMAS
LOGLINE:
A young BUSINESS WOMAN, tasked with terminating a restaurant in her hometown, returns there to lower the boom. At her parent's holiday themed hotel, she gets caught up in the whirlwind of holidaylicious romance and finds herself with child. Oopsie! She's not sure who daddy is (but she's fine with that). Is it her boss who's arrived to lower his own boom? Or is it one of three triplet brothers who she may have accidentally made whoopie with? Who spiked the egg-nog!??! Whoopsie! You'll live, you'll love, you'll laugh when Ri-Ri Cummings comes home for Christmas!
TAGLINE:
It's Christmas baby... so who's your daddy?
Now that's not very nice dear readers. Pretend I didn't write that.
Time for a complete reset. It's been such a while that I've worked on this, I think we all (myself included) need to go back and reexamine what we already have. I'm talking like, Square One. So, here we go...
TITLE:
CUMMING HOME FOR CHRISTMAS
LOGLINE:
A young BUSINESS WOMAN, tasked with terminating a restaurant in her hometown, returns there to lower the boom. At her parent's holiday themed hotel, she gets caught up in the whirlwind of holidaylicious romance and finds herself with child. Oopsie! She's not sure who daddy is (but she's fine with that). Is it her boss who's arrived to lower his own boom? Or is it one of three triplet brothers who she may have accidentally made whoopie with? Who spiked the egg-nog!??! Whoopsie! You'll live, you'll love, you'll laugh when Ri-Ri Cummings comes home for Christmas!
TAGLINE:
It's Christmas baby... so who's your daddy?
SETTING(S):
A large American city that has tall buildings and does a lot of BUSINESS type business. You know: THE BIG CITY. The other primary location is a town in Vermont called WINOOSKI FALLS, which is an actual place in the far North of the state. Picked primarily for its amusing name; the town is not far from Burlington, VT. It's also right near Lake Champlain and not so very far from Montreal, Canada. Which I'm now thinking is going to afford this story a romantic weekend fling with Gino Vannelli playing under it and also a sighting of "Champy, America's Loch Ness Monster"! Maybe even Gino Vannelli RIDING Champy!
CAST OF CHARACTERS:
HONORIA "RI-RI" OR "RI" CUMMINGS / 20s to 30s
Honoria works in the BIG CITY for JOHNSON AMALGAMATED. It's a company that specializes in owning businesses, doing business in and at those businesses; and promoting those business endeavors through it's in-house promotional department. This is the branch that Honoria works for. Honoria is a sensible kind of person with a head for business and a bod for sin, as someone once said. It's business first though, and pleasure maybe later. She's a bit underappreciated at work. Or maybe taken for granted by her boss, Marlon Johnson; the owner and CEO etc. of the company. She may have a bit of a crush on him and is in denial about it. Honoria is the kind of woman who has known what she's wanted from childhood; and that includes children. But it doesn't necessarily include a husband or the traditional family unit. She grew up in a somewhat unconventional family in Vermont so she's pretty open minded. And yet, kind of traditional at the same time. She does have a bit of a wild streak though--something else she might be in denial about.
MARLON JOHNSON / LATE 20'S TO EARLY 40'S
Marlon is the heir to the Johnson Amalgamated fortune and it's somewhat reluctant Chief Executive. Business comes quite naturally to him; in fact, he can kind of do it blindfolded. Brought up in wealth, he has it all; but has managed to avoid a lot of the ennui that having it all can engender. In fact, he may be more than a little bored. Maybe he wants kids too. And perhaps a traditional kind of family. Good natured and easy going as he is; he still puts in the work. He is, of course, drop-dead gorgeous and prone to taking his shirt off, even in meetings. He never has less than three buttons undone. And he can pull it off.
A large American city that has tall buildings and does a lot of BUSINESS type business. You know: THE BIG CITY. The other primary location is a town in Vermont called WINOOSKI FALLS, which is an actual place in the far North of the state. Picked primarily for its amusing name; the town is not far from Burlington, VT. It's also right near Lake Champlain and not so very far from Montreal, Canada. Which I'm now thinking is going to afford this story a romantic weekend fling with Gino Vannelli playing under it and also a sighting of "Champy, America's Loch Ness Monster"! Maybe even Gino Vannelli RIDING Champy!
CAST OF CHARACTERS:
HONORIA "RI-RI" OR "RI" CUMMINGS / 20s to 30s
Honoria works in the BIG CITY for JOHNSON AMALGAMATED. It's a company that specializes in owning businesses, doing business in and at those businesses; and promoting those business endeavors through it's in-house promotional department. This is the branch that Honoria works for. Honoria is a sensible kind of person with a head for business and a bod for sin, as someone once said. It's business first though, and pleasure maybe later. She's a bit underappreciated at work. Or maybe taken for granted by her boss, Marlon Johnson; the owner and CEO etc. of the company. She may have a bit of a crush on him and is in denial about it. Honoria is the kind of woman who has known what she's wanted from childhood; and that includes children. But it doesn't necessarily include a husband or the traditional family unit. She grew up in a somewhat unconventional family in Vermont so she's pretty open minded. And yet, kind of traditional at the same time. She does have a bit of a wild streak though--something else she might be in denial about.
MARLON JOHNSON / LATE 20'S TO EARLY 40'S
Marlon is the heir to the Johnson Amalgamated fortune and it's somewhat reluctant Chief Executive. Business comes quite naturally to him; in fact, he can kind of do it blindfolded. Brought up in wealth, he has it all; but has managed to avoid a lot of the ennui that having it all can engender. In fact, he may be more than a little bored. Maybe he wants kids too. And perhaps a traditional kind of family. Good natured and easy going as he is; he still puts in the work. He is, of course, drop-dead gorgeous and prone to taking his shirt off, even in meetings. He never has less than three buttons undone. And he can pull it off.
JURGIN TURPIN / 30'S TO 40'S
Before we get to Mr. Turpin, I think it's time for a Gino Vannelli break...
Before we get to Mr. Turpin, I think it's time for a Gino Vannelli break...
Jurgin is Ri's "ADMIN" or ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT. He's her Right Hand Man, although he prefers Left Hand Man. Her Dude Friday. He knows what she wants before she even knows what it is; but that doesn't necessarily mean she's going to get it if he doesn't feel like giving it. Jurgin is a contradiction in terms. A workaholic and slacker. Brain dead one second, Creative Genius the next. Prone to singing out loud. Hates working in an office but needs that sweet, sweet Executive Goss. He's gay. Some might say he's "flamboyant" even. He likes older, super-butch dudes. Actually dates them instead of other Queens 'cuz that actually happens in real life, unlike on TV. Can be cutting but likes to have fun. Doesn't suffer fools well, unless he feels like fooling around. Doesn't work with dogs or kids. Cats, maybe.
ASHER "ASH" KRUMHOLTZ / 50'S-60'S (Whatever is age appropriate in relation to being RI'S FATHER)
Ash is Ri's dad. He is also the Sherrif of Winooski Falls and the OWNER AND OPERATOR of KRUMHOLTZ'S ALL HOLIDAYS INN HOTEL. He was also going to be the Mayor of Winooski Falls; but that might be spreading him too thin. Ash looks, talks, walks and acts a lot like ACTOR JUDD NELSON when Judd is playing a nice guy; which isn't often. So, maybe we could just have him be himself. What's that you're asking? How can Judd play anything nicer than just tolerably douchey? Uhhhm, I'm gonna say by not actually acting? Here's the "real" Judd, talking to Rosie O'Donnell
ASHER "ASH" KRUMHOLTZ / 50'S-60'S (Whatever is age appropriate in relation to being RI'S FATHER)
Ash is Ri's dad. He is also the Sherrif of Winooski Falls and the OWNER AND OPERATOR of KRUMHOLTZ'S ALL HOLIDAYS INN HOTEL. He was also going to be the Mayor of Winooski Falls; but that might be spreading him too thin. Ash looks, talks, walks and acts a lot like ACTOR JUDD NELSON when Judd is playing a nice guy; which isn't often. So, maybe we could just have him be himself. What's that you're asking? How can Judd play anything nicer than just tolerably douchey? Uhhhm, I'm gonna say by not actually acting? Here's the "real" Judd, talking to Rosie O'Donnell
STONEY PETERSON / 40's PLUS
Stoney is the HANDYMAN at the All Holidays Inn. He's the TALL, DARK (BALD? SALT AND PEPPER? SHY AND QUIET? WHATEVS!) AND HANDSOME TYPE a.k.a. a DILF or perhaps even GILF. A Silver Fox, if you will. AND YOU WILL! He's the sort of stoic type of gentleman. Not monosyllabic; but also not polysyllabic. You find a lot of these type men in the Northeast. Still waters run deep though and Stoney has recently come out of the outhouse and is on the market. So is Jurgin. Potentialities...
Stoney is the HANDYMAN at the All Holidays Inn. He's the TALL, DARK (BALD? SALT AND PEPPER? SHY AND QUIET? WHATEVS!) AND HANDSOME TYPE a.k.a. a DILF or perhaps even GILF. A Silver Fox, if you will. AND YOU WILL! He's the sort of stoic type of gentleman. Not monosyllabic; but also not polysyllabic. You find a lot of these type men in the Northeast. Still waters run deep though and Stoney has recently come out of the outhouse and is on the market. So is Jurgin. Potentialities...
WHACK MY WEEDS, DADDY!
JEANETTE "JEAN" CUMMINGS-KRUMHOLTZ / 40S TO 60S
Jean is Ri-Ri's MOTHER and Ash's WIFE. A little older but looks a lot younger. Think Julia Louis-Dreyfus. She's the Vermont-Earthy-Crunchy type by way of upscale Manhattan. She's not a very good cook but she loves to do it. She's always into the latest fad not so much because she's trendy; but because she has a real interest in people, things and life in general. She's also a bit of the classic yenta, in particular with Ri; who she really thinks should be married because she wants to hurry up and be a grandmother already. When she met and married Ash, she followed him to Vermont but she's still a city girl at heart.
MRS. SCHATZIE SCHNEEBALLE (AGELESS)
Mrs. Schneeballe is the PROPRIETRESS-RESTAURATEURTRIX of Jolly Jingle's Restaurant in Winooski Falls, that Ri is sent to close. The same ACTOR also plays the mysterious LITTLE OLD LADY/STREET VENDOR at the the beginning of the film.
THE SCHNEEBALLE TRIPLETS: ZWEI, DREI AND EINS (MID TO LATE 20S-30'S)
Zwei, Drei and Eins are fully grown IDENTICAL TRIPLETS. They are the SONS of Mrs. Schneeballe and work at Jolly Jingles Restaurant. Prone to speaking in unison and in a slight, vaguely European accent (GAMMELTJULESPRAKIAN). Their mother's English is even more vague and they oftent interpret for her.
THE TRILLINGER TRIPLETS
More to come!
JEANETTE "JEAN" CUMMINGS-KRUMHOLTZ / 40S TO 60S
Jean is Ri-Ri's MOTHER and Ash's WIFE. A little older but looks a lot younger. Think Julia Louis-Dreyfus. She's the Vermont-Earthy-Crunchy type by way of upscale Manhattan. She's not a very good cook but she loves to do it. She's always into the latest fad not so much because she's trendy; but because she has a real interest in people, things and life in general. She's also a bit of the classic yenta, in particular with Ri; who she really thinks should be married because she wants to hurry up and be a grandmother already. When she met and married Ash, she followed him to Vermont but she's still a city girl at heart.
MRS. SCHATZIE SCHNEEBALLE (AGELESS)
Mrs. Schneeballe is the PROPRIETRESS-RESTAURATEURTRIX of Jolly Jingle's Restaurant in Winooski Falls, that Ri is sent to close. The same ACTOR also plays the mysterious LITTLE OLD LADY/STREET VENDOR at the the beginning of the film.
THE SCHNEEBALLE TRIPLETS: ZWEI, DREI AND EINS (MID TO LATE 20S-30'S)
Zwei, Drei and Eins are fully grown IDENTICAL TRIPLETS. They are the SONS of Mrs. Schneeballe and work at Jolly Jingles Restaurant. Prone to speaking in unison and in a slight, vaguely European accent (GAMMELTJULESPRAKIAN). Their mother's English is even more vague and they oftent interpret for her.
THE TRILLINGER TRIPLETS
More to come!