Okay, not to be weird or gross or anything; but that is three sets of really nice lips right there. Let's leave Molly out of this, as she was probably 17 or so when this photo was taken. But Cryer was of legal drinking age and McCarthy was about as close to 30 as he was high school age here. Now, I haven't seen Euphoria, but my understanding is that it's a show written by adults about high school students who do drugs and indulge in pornographic levels of nudity and heavy petting. So, my imaginging Duckie and Blane super heavy-petting...is that even nearly as bad? I mean, at least I'm not imagining them doing rails of coke off a toilet tank lid before going at it in a bathroom stall as they livestream it to OnlyFans. Well, at least I wasn't. And, no. I'm still not. But as I mentioned in the prior blog, I do have three scenes in my head for this endeavour and I want to share them with you. Do you want me to share them with you? I don't know...but you can always stop reading, write? Errr--right? But before we begin that, I can't help but wonder...
Just where is this brick wall?
Brick wall, Chris? What are you talking about?
That brick wall. The one they're leaning on.
Oh! That brick wall! What do you mean, you "wonder" where it is? Are you wondering about a wall?
Cue the video!
Just where is this brick wall?
Brick wall, Chris? What are you talking about?
That brick wall. The one they're leaning on.
Oh! That brick wall! What do you mean, you "wonder" where it is? Are you wondering about a wall?
Cue the video!
Okay, make that four scenes. I've decided to tackle the grungy, gay bar scene. Hey, if Euphoria can do it...but wait, does Euphoria do it? Does Euphoria have gay male characters? I don't know. I'll keep it to a soft "R" if anything. But hey, I was sneaking into gay bars when I was like, 16, so, it's not really out of the realm of possibility. Besides, the kids in Pretty In Pink are seen in a nightclub in several scenes; one which serves alcohol, which raises a lot of questions, which I will try to address. Or at least bring up. In the meantime, let's get back to that "wall"!
I love looking at "alternate" takes of things. Or deleted scenes, particularly of things I've seen a thousand times. It's really strange when you see a scene from a movie you know by heart that you don't know; ya know? 'Frinstance, the iconic poster image of PIP. We've all seen it and know it. It's in black and white. It's Blane, Andie and Duckie. Sometimes it's slightly color tinted with a subtle pink hue. Sometimes Andie's top is colorized bright pink:
I love looking at "alternate" takes of things. Or deleted scenes, particularly of things I've seen a thousand times. It's really strange when you see a scene from a movie you know by heart that you don't know; ya know? 'Frinstance, the iconic poster image of PIP. We've all seen it and know it. It's in black and white. It's Blane, Andie and Duckie. Sometimes it's slightly color tinted with a subtle pink hue. Sometimes Andie's top is colorized bright pink:
But sometimes you can find alternate shots from the same photo session; of which, this one has several:
Now I'm kinda super curious as to where these photos were taken. I think I'd make a good detective. Judging from the preponderance of bricks, my guess is that they are somewhere near/in/around/next to the building which housed "Trax" records, which I've found in my research was an actual space in The Keller Building in Santa Monica, CA at 1460 3rd Street:
But which doorway? And who scrawled the grafitti behind them? Who is "LA"? Is that grafitti possibly still there? What happened to "LA"? I think about these things. Anyways...let's move along and try to wrap this up. Coming up next:
Blane and Duckie "meet cute" at a leather bar. Or should that be "meat cute"? Ewwwwwwwww! No, Chris. Just no.
Anyways, in order to set up the gay bar scene, we have to have a reason for it. In this parallel universe of Pretty In Pink, I guess we're going with a polyamorous vibe. And I guess, a multi-amorous vibe. That is to say...I don't know about you; but back in the day, when I was a teen, I was generally crushing on numerous people simultaneously. Usually with the same intensity in each case. Now is this true of most people? Or was I slutty; at least emotionally? I've also read it's a Sagittarian trait. Andrew McCarthy is a Sagittarius...can you see where I'm going with this? Maybe "Blane McDonagh" could be just as much in love with Duckie as he is with Andie. Maybe Steff too! I don't know. I think it's more realistic and I think it's something most people wouldn't admit. let alone act on. "Oh," Blane might say, "I only have eyes for you!" when really, he's got eyes for numerous people. Maybe even Iona. But this is a movie, an experience we go to for a vicarious experience. Anyways, Andie is going to fall just as hard for Steff as she is Blane. But sorry Duckie: Andie was never interested in you that way and she never will be. You're her little brother for cryin' out loud.
So in this version, Steff has sought out Andie as his chemistry class partner. At some point, Steff asks Andie to the prom, knowing his best friend Blane likes her, thus, breaking "Bro Code." Now, I imagine the scene in the boys locker room, after class. The high school locker room is a pretty common filmic trope and I ask: can it ever be anything other than prurient? For example, the opening credits of Carrie. Erotic? Yes. Arousing? Probably for some. But these are supposed to be high school girls, right? Correct! So, do we really need to be seeing this? Well, uhhm...gee...well...you see...ah, that is to say...the actresses are all in there 20s! Yeah, but we're supposed to think they're high school age, right? Well, uhhm, you see...that is to say...ah, but, you see...
In my version of this, "Duckie Dale" is being played by Robert Downey Jr. (who I believe was actually up for this part). Nothing against Jon Cryer but his interpretation of Duckie never quite worked for me. I prefer the silent type. Silent to the point of mute; which Jon couldn't be farther from. Just a preference.
INT. BOYS LOCKER ROOM -DAY
Duckie is sitting on the bench between the rows of lockers in his gym clothes. He takes off his t-shirt and wipes his armpits and sniffs the shirt and shrugs. Boys in various states of undress are coming from or heading to the showers. Blane turns the corner and stops short when he sees Duckie. He knows Duckie is Andie's friend and he knows Duckie doesn't like him. But he tries anyways, as he opens his locker.
BLANE
(To Duckie) Hey...
DUCKIE
Hey.
BLANE
You're really good with the b-ball.
DUCKIE
You mean the basket ball?
BLANE
Yeah. Couple of times it was nothing but net, man.
DUCKIE
Does that surprise you?
BLANE
I--well, no. I just meant that--
DUCKIE
Look. Please don't try to be nice to me. It won't work.
Duckie rises from the bench and takes his shorts off. He's standing there in a jock and Chuck Taylors. Blane looks at him a little longer than he should; and now he really is suprised. Duckie is usually under twenty layers of clothing. Who knew "all that" was under there? Blane looks away.
BLANE
Sorry. I'll just shut up.
Two boys come into the space. They are perfect physical specimens with even more perfect hair. The first boy, ALAN, 17 sits.
ALAN
Hey Blane.
BLANE
Hi.
The second boy, JOSH, 17 opens his locker and looks at himself in the mirror.
JOSH
(To Alan) You have chem with Steff, right?
ALAN
Yeah, fifth period.
JOSH
I heard he asked that girl to the prom; the one who's always in the funky outfits...
ALAN
Yeah, she's his partner. She's quiet but she's actually really cute. What's her name?
JOSH
Sandy or Candy or something?
Blane and Duckie exchange a glance. Blane storms off.
CUT TO:
INT. LOCKER ROOM SHOWER AREA -DAY
Blane, still dressed, comes charging into the area, his head turning left and right. He spots Steff in the showers and rushes towards him. Steff is talking to another BOY who montions towards Blane. Steff turns and looks Blane up and down.
STEFF
(Smiling, not understanding) Hey Blane. You know, most people usually do this part in their birthday suit.
BLANE
Did you ask Andie Walsh to the prom?
ASIDES: SYNCHRONICITY OR RUMORS?
I don't want to spread rumors, yet they exist, have existed...will exist. But I would like to discuss a few which are probably more back-in-the-day-WISHFUL-THINKING than anything else. Back in the day there were a lot of rumors about Olivia Newton-John; that maybe she liked "the ladies" as much as she liked "the studs." Tell me about it, stud...
Blane and Duckie "meet cute" at a leather bar. Or should that be "meat cute"? Ewwwwwwwww! No, Chris. Just no.
Anyways, in order to set up the gay bar scene, we have to have a reason for it. In this parallel universe of Pretty In Pink, I guess we're going with a polyamorous vibe. And I guess, a multi-amorous vibe. That is to say...I don't know about you; but back in the day, when I was a teen, I was generally crushing on numerous people simultaneously. Usually with the same intensity in each case. Now is this true of most people? Or was I slutty; at least emotionally? I've also read it's a Sagittarian trait. Andrew McCarthy is a Sagittarius...can you see where I'm going with this? Maybe "Blane McDonagh" could be just as much in love with Duckie as he is with Andie. Maybe Steff too! I don't know. I think it's more realistic and I think it's something most people wouldn't admit. let alone act on. "Oh," Blane might say, "I only have eyes for you!" when really, he's got eyes for numerous people. Maybe even Iona. But this is a movie, an experience we go to for a vicarious experience. Anyways, Andie is going to fall just as hard for Steff as she is Blane. But sorry Duckie: Andie was never interested in you that way and she never will be. You're her little brother for cryin' out loud.
So in this version, Steff has sought out Andie as his chemistry class partner. At some point, Steff asks Andie to the prom, knowing his best friend Blane likes her, thus, breaking "Bro Code." Now, I imagine the scene in the boys locker room, after class. The high school locker room is a pretty common filmic trope and I ask: can it ever be anything other than prurient? For example, the opening credits of Carrie. Erotic? Yes. Arousing? Probably for some. But these are supposed to be high school girls, right? Correct! So, do we really need to be seeing this? Well, uhhm...gee...well...you see...ah, that is to say...the actresses are all in there 20s! Yeah, but we're supposed to think they're high school age, right? Well, uhhm, you see...that is to say...ah, but, you see...
In my version of this, "Duckie Dale" is being played by Robert Downey Jr. (who I believe was actually up for this part). Nothing against Jon Cryer but his interpretation of Duckie never quite worked for me. I prefer the silent type. Silent to the point of mute; which Jon couldn't be farther from. Just a preference.
INT. BOYS LOCKER ROOM -DAY
Duckie is sitting on the bench between the rows of lockers in his gym clothes. He takes off his t-shirt and wipes his armpits and sniffs the shirt and shrugs. Boys in various states of undress are coming from or heading to the showers. Blane turns the corner and stops short when he sees Duckie. He knows Duckie is Andie's friend and he knows Duckie doesn't like him. But he tries anyways, as he opens his locker.
BLANE
(To Duckie) Hey...
DUCKIE
Hey.
BLANE
You're really good with the b-ball.
DUCKIE
You mean the basket ball?
BLANE
Yeah. Couple of times it was nothing but net, man.
DUCKIE
Does that surprise you?
BLANE
I--well, no. I just meant that--
DUCKIE
Look. Please don't try to be nice to me. It won't work.
Duckie rises from the bench and takes his shorts off. He's standing there in a jock and Chuck Taylors. Blane looks at him a little longer than he should; and now he really is suprised. Duckie is usually under twenty layers of clothing. Who knew "all that" was under there? Blane looks away.
BLANE
Sorry. I'll just shut up.
Two boys come into the space. They are perfect physical specimens with even more perfect hair. The first boy, ALAN, 17 sits.
ALAN
Hey Blane.
BLANE
Hi.
The second boy, JOSH, 17 opens his locker and looks at himself in the mirror.
JOSH
(To Alan) You have chem with Steff, right?
ALAN
Yeah, fifth period.
JOSH
I heard he asked that girl to the prom; the one who's always in the funky outfits...
ALAN
Yeah, she's his partner. She's quiet but she's actually really cute. What's her name?
JOSH
Sandy or Candy or something?
Blane and Duckie exchange a glance. Blane storms off.
CUT TO:
INT. LOCKER ROOM SHOWER AREA -DAY
Blane, still dressed, comes charging into the area, his head turning left and right. He spots Steff in the showers and rushes towards him. Steff is talking to another BOY who montions towards Blane. Steff turns and looks Blane up and down.
STEFF
(Smiling, not understanding) Hey Blane. You know, most people usually do this part in their birthday suit.
BLANE
Did you ask Andie Walsh to the prom?
ASIDES: SYNCHRONICITY OR RUMORS?
I don't want to spread rumors, yet they exist, have existed...will exist. But I would like to discuss a few which are probably more back-in-the-day-WISHFUL-THINKING than anything else. Back in the day there were a lot of rumors about Olivia Newton-John; that maybe she liked "the ladies" as much as she liked "the studs." Tell me about it, stud...
That the song had Elton John all over it did little to quell the, ah, rumors (or rumours). It may have added fuel to the fire. Or was she fighting fire with fire?
I remember back in the day there were rumors in the gay community that Andrew McCarthy and James Spader were more than just co-stars, having appeard together in three films, one on top of the other(!). Yeah, that was probably the old wishful think. Not thunk. Or is it thinked?
And also, many were convinced that Robert Downey Jr. enjoyed the company of others in a polyamorous way. That he played "Julian" in Less Than Zero, a famously generous-with-his ding-ding-to-all-comers character probably added more fuel to that fire than Olivia's warbling with Sir Elton. Interesting side story, I was at the Honeymoon in Vegas premiere and Robert Downey Jr. was a couple of rows in front of me with a friend. A friend who was not a lady. I recalled the hair on the back of my neck, electrified, standing on end. I was with a guy from work who I was HOT for, so maybe I was just horny. No, I was definitely horny. My eyebrows shot up to the stratosphere. I mean, I have no idea who it was, but it wasn't Sarah Jessica Parker. And I couldn't help but wonder...can I get in on that? Interesting that she's now married to Ferris Bueller; yet another John Hughes connection. And of course, this John Hughes connection:
I remember back in the day there were rumors in the gay community that Andrew McCarthy and James Spader were more than just co-stars, having appeard together in three films, one on top of the other(!). Yeah, that was probably the old wishful think. Not thunk. Or is it thinked?
And also, many were convinced that Robert Downey Jr. enjoyed the company of others in a polyamorous way. That he played "Julian" in Less Than Zero, a famously generous-with-his ding-ding-to-all-comers character probably added more fuel to that fire than Olivia's warbling with Sir Elton. Interesting side story, I was at the Honeymoon in Vegas premiere and Robert Downey Jr. was a couple of rows in front of me with a friend. A friend who was not a lady. I recalled the hair on the back of my neck, electrified, standing on end. I was with a guy from work who I was HOT for, so maybe I was just horny. No, I was definitely horny. My eyebrows shot up to the stratosphere. I mean, I have no idea who it was, but it wasn't Sarah Jessica Parker. And I couldn't help but wonder...can I get in on that? Interesting that she's now married to Ferris Bueller; yet another John Hughes connection. And of course, this John Hughes connection:
And this is all in light-hearted fun. I am not a doctor and I have not treated Robert Downey Jr. nor have I played a doctor on TV. I'm not even sure that was him two rows in front of me. Maybe it was the guy next to him in the above photo. The one between him and Anthony Michael Hall. Yeah, that's it.
More thoughts...
DEAR GOD, STOP ME BEFORE I THINK AGAIN! (written on a mirror in pink lipstick)
Speaking of Weird Science...
That movie has gym scenes. It has a male on male on male on male depantsing scene. Forgot about that one. Let's see if we can find a video clip. Oh yeah, here it is!
More thoughts...
DEAR GOD, STOP ME BEFORE I THINK AGAIN! (written on a mirror in pink lipstick)
Speaking of Weird Science...
That movie has gym scenes. It has a male on male on male on male depantsing scene. Forgot about that one. Let's see if we can find a video clip. Oh yeah, here it is!
Yeah, so I'm gonna ask it again. What was going on John Hughes?
Speaking of the guy between Anthony and Robert, that's one Mr. Robert Rusler. He appeared quite a bit, back in the day, in various states of shirtlessness and often in the vicinity of gym lockers:
Speaking of the guy between Anthony and Robert, that's one Mr. Robert Rusler. He appeared quite a bit, back in the day, in various states of shirtlessness and often in the vicinity of gym lockers:
According to "Data Lounge," and apparently Mr. Rusler's Facebook page, he's "interested" in both women and men. I know I wouldn't kick him out of bed for taking Centrum Silver! As a matter of fact, he, me, Robert D. J. and Jon Cryer were all born in 1965, which makes us all 59. And 59 is the new 39! Lemon Party anyone?
Okay, enough of this silliness. I will close out this train of thought. I should mention though, that Mr. Rusler was in A Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge, which I've never seen. Apparently it's queer meta-text is not just subtext; but text, text. Maybe even uber-text! I really need to watch it; but let's look at the trailer so we're all on the same page!
Okay, enough of this silliness. I will close out this train of thought. I should mention though, that Mr. Rusler was in A Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge, which I've never seen. Apparently it's queer meta-text is not just subtext; but text, text. Maybe even uber-text! I really need to watch it; but let's look at the trailer so we're all on the same page!
So, have I won my "homo-erotic, teen-age-boy-locker-room-shower-stall-gay-bar-back-room-love-fest-is-perfectly-normal-for-a-39-err-59-year-old-man-to-write" argument? I guess if it was good enough for Euphoria, John Hughes and Freddy Krueger, it's good enough for me! So please see PART 6 of this for the continuation...and I swear, I really will try and wrap it up.
CFR 1/2/25
CFR 1/2/25