MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR THE RECENT FILM, SINNERS.
My husband and I saw Sinners on Saturday. We had seen the trailer for it numerous times and my husband was like: "We are seeing that!" It certainly looked interesting to me as well; but when he's super interested in something, I automatically put that at the top of the list (because Lord knows I don't want to hear it, if it folds before we get a chance to see it at the theater). I was immediately taken in by the gorgeous cinematography; and as its story unfolded, I became more and more--
CICELY TYSON
--Honey don't do it....
CHRIS
Ladies and Gentlepersons...Miss Cicely Tyson!
My husband and I saw Sinners on Saturday. We had seen the trailer for it numerous times and my husband was like: "We are seeing that!" It certainly looked interesting to me as well; but when he's super interested in something, I automatically put that at the top of the list (because Lord knows I don't want to hear it, if it folds before we get a chance to see it at the theater). I was immediately taken in by the gorgeous cinematography; and as its story unfolded, I became more and more--
CICELY TYSON
--Honey don't do it....
CHRIS
Ladies and Gentlepersons...Miss Cicely Tyson!
CICELY
Thank you.
CHRIS
Don't do what Cicely?
CICELY
Don't you play that with me. You know what I'm talking about.
CHRIS
Oh, you mean the comparisons I'm going to draw between Sinners, the recent smash-hit, everyone is talking about it African-American vampire picture; and--
CICELY
I said don't play.
CHRIS
Fine. Why? Why shouldn't I?
CICELY
Because you're starting to come across as a straight-up fool.
CHRIS
You're right. I am. I mean, I basically just proclaimed to the wind that I inspired The Best Picture of 2025, or is that 2024? I can never keep that straight! So why should I stop with this one?
CICELY
You know, I was gonna give you a pass for dragging me to see that Viva Craptastica show, too. Oh well.
CHRIS
Cicely, come on. You know I can't not do this. I've got to speak my truth. You should know that. You spoke yours like a clarion call. You proclaimed your intent to be a role model: loud and often. I'm just taking cues from you, Miss December Nineteenth.
CICELY
Sometimes you've got to know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em; but you seem determined. I know...how about I go find Miss Lena Horne to help you out? Because I just can not.
CHRIS
Thanks, Cicely. That would be terrific!
CICELY
All right. Well, take care honey. You be you. I'll send her back.
CHRIS
Let's hear it for Miss T. everybody!
WILD APPLAUSE!
CHRIS
So, while we wait for Miss Horne; I wanted to show y'all something. It was something I showed my husband and I said, "What does this remind you of?"
Thank you.
CHRIS
Don't do what Cicely?
CICELY
Don't you play that with me. You know what I'm talking about.
CHRIS
Oh, you mean the comparisons I'm going to draw between Sinners, the recent smash-hit, everyone is talking about it African-American vampire picture; and--
CICELY
I said don't play.
CHRIS
Fine. Why? Why shouldn't I?
CICELY
Because you're starting to come across as a straight-up fool.
CHRIS
You're right. I am. I mean, I basically just proclaimed to the wind that I inspired The Best Picture of 2025, or is that 2024? I can never keep that straight! So why should I stop with this one?
CICELY
You know, I was gonna give you a pass for dragging me to see that Viva Craptastica show, too. Oh well.
CHRIS
Cicely, come on. You know I can't not do this. I've got to speak my truth. You should know that. You spoke yours like a clarion call. You proclaimed your intent to be a role model: loud and often. I'm just taking cues from you, Miss December Nineteenth.
CICELY
Sometimes you've got to know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em; but you seem determined. I know...how about I go find Miss Lena Horne to help you out? Because I just can not.
CHRIS
Thanks, Cicely. That would be terrific!
CICELY
All right. Well, take care honey. You be you. I'll send her back.
CHRIS
Let's hear it for Miss T. everybody!
WILD APPLAUSE!
CHRIS
So, while we wait for Miss Horne; I wanted to show y'all something. It was something I showed my husband and I said, "What does this remind you of?"
Now, my husband does not often concede to my, shall we say "theories" about what may or may not be going on with my work. As a matter of fact, he goes out of his way to play the devil's advocate. Not only will he not give an inch(!), usually; but I'm lucky if I can get a grudging millimeter. So imagine my surprise when he said, without a scintilla of hestitation: "Kinda reminds me of your book."
The "book" in question is the self-published version of my screenplay-saga: HEARTFIGHT.
Here is the front of the softcover:
The "book" in question is the self-published version of my screenplay-saga: HEARTFIGHT.
Here is the front of the softcover:
LENA HORNE
Now, I don't think they look anything alike; other than the colors, the evocation of burning wood and that metallic element on a diagonal across the center...oh, and that the color of the text is exactly the same in both...other than that...
CHRIS
Ladies and gentlepeople: Miss Lena Horne!
LENA
Thank y'all. And now I'm gonna sing...
Now, I don't think they look anything alike; other than the colors, the evocation of burning wood and that metallic element on a diagonal across the center...oh, and that the color of the text is exactly the same in both...other than that...
CHRIS
Ladies and gentlepeople: Miss Lena Horne!
LENA
Thank y'all. And now I'm gonna sing...
WILD APPLAUSE!
CHRIS
Thank you Miss Horne, that was lovely!
LENA HORNE
Oh, you may call me Lena, honey.
CHRIS
Okay. Lena, can I ask you something?
LENA
Sure, sugar.
CHRIS
Why do you have that lovely, lilting accent when you were born in Bed-Stuy?
LENA
I spent much time in Georgia when I was a little girl.
CHRIS
Oh, really? I spent a lot of time in the south when I was a child too!
LENA
Really? Where?
CHRIS
Mostly North Carolina. Virginia some; which is where I now reside.
LENA
Seems as though we have a few things in common. Now, Cicely was telling me that you need some help...
CHRIS
Yes! I was wondering if you could assist me--
LENA
No. Help. As in: "you need help."
CHRIS
Oh, yeah. Well, that's goes without saying. But I do need some help with anger management and you seem like, super mellow!
LENA
I'm as laid back as warm milk, fresh from the cow honey.
CHRIS
Ah, okay...
LENA
Now what are you angry about?
CHRIS
I saw a movie recently and I feel that it bears striking similarities to my own creative work, right down to the movie poster. And it makes me mad. My first thought was to fly off the handle and start j'accusing people of stuff but then I calmed down and said to myself: "I don't want that on me." This movie has brotherhood, literally, as one of it's overarching themes and that made me think of my own brother...and I got mad. Really mad!
LENA
Why? Does your brother make you mad?
CHRIS
Yes. He does. And he recently passed away and I don't think he had to and it makes me mad!
LENA
I'm sorry for you loss.
CHRIS
Thank you.
LENA
What was his name?
CHRIS
John.
CHRIS
Thank you Miss Horne, that was lovely!
LENA HORNE
Oh, you may call me Lena, honey.
CHRIS
Okay. Lena, can I ask you something?
LENA
Sure, sugar.
CHRIS
Why do you have that lovely, lilting accent when you were born in Bed-Stuy?
LENA
I spent much time in Georgia when I was a little girl.
CHRIS
Oh, really? I spent a lot of time in the south when I was a child too!
LENA
Really? Where?
CHRIS
Mostly North Carolina. Virginia some; which is where I now reside.
LENA
Seems as though we have a few things in common. Now, Cicely was telling me that you need some help...
CHRIS
Yes! I was wondering if you could assist me--
LENA
No. Help. As in: "you need help."
CHRIS
Oh, yeah. Well, that's goes without saying. But I do need some help with anger management and you seem like, super mellow!
LENA
I'm as laid back as warm milk, fresh from the cow honey.
CHRIS
Ah, okay...
LENA
Now what are you angry about?
CHRIS
I saw a movie recently and I feel that it bears striking similarities to my own creative work, right down to the movie poster. And it makes me mad. My first thought was to fly off the handle and start j'accusing people of stuff but then I calmed down and said to myself: "I don't want that on me." This movie has brotherhood, literally, as one of it's overarching themes and that made me think of my own brother...and I got mad. Really mad!
LENA
Why? Does your brother make you mad?
CHRIS
Yes. He does. And he recently passed away and I don't think he had to and it makes me mad!
LENA
I'm sorry for you loss.
CHRIS
Thank you.
LENA
What was his name?
CHRIS
John.
LENA
Who's with him there?
CHRIS
My sister Kate. They got along like cats and dogs. Well, he got along with everyone like cats and dogs. She's a saint.
LENA
What happened?
CHRIS
I'd rather not go into that right now. None of it was good.
LENA
All right. Well let's talk about this movie. You say it was about brotherhood?
CHRIS
Yes; and in this case, identical twin brothers.
LENA
I'm a little behind in my picture show viewing. Give me the elevator pitch.
CHRIS
Black twin brothers in 1930's rural South open a juke-joint featuring a young blues guitarist so good, he summons forth evil forces on opening night causing those present to fight for their very souls.
LENA
Hmmm. I prefer musicals myself.
CHRIS
It kind of is a musical!
LENA
You don't say...
CHRIS
Yeah, Delta blues, mostly; and, also Irish folk music.
LENA
Is it set in Ireland?
CHRIS
No, It's not. And the villain is an Irish vampire.
LENA
An Irish vampire? Is that a thing?
CHRIS
I guess it is now.* But here's the real thing: the Irish vampire and the folk music he sings in the movie--
LENA
There's a singing Irish vampire in this picture?
CHRIS
Yes. And it's like all anyone can talk about. My phone is flooded with articles basically all posing the same question--
LENA
Your phone?
CHRIS
Just go with it.
LENA
What's the question?
CHRIS
Basically the question is: "Why is there so much Irish music in this movie set in the Mississippi delta in 1932?"
LENA
Seems like a good question. And a logical one. What was the answer?
CHRIS
Well, the writer, director when asked about this rather startling element of his picture responded that he's "obsessed" with Irish folk music; as well as his kids; and that his first name is Irish.
LENA
What's his first name?
CHRIS
Ryan.
LENA
Is he Irish?
CHRIS
Well, he's African-American...so I'm gonna have to go with "no" on that. His last name is Coogler, which also sounds kind of Irish.
Who's with him there?
CHRIS
My sister Kate. They got along like cats and dogs. Well, he got along with everyone like cats and dogs. She's a saint.
LENA
What happened?
CHRIS
I'd rather not go into that right now. None of it was good.
LENA
All right. Well let's talk about this movie. You say it was about brotherhood?
CHRIS
Yes; and in this case, identical twin brothers.
LENA
I'm a little behind in my picture show viewing. Give me the elevator pitch.
CHRIS
Black twin brothers in 1930's rural South open a juke-joint featuring a young blues guitarist so good, he summons forth evil forces on opening night causing those present to fight for their very souls.
LENA
Hmmm. I prefer musicals myself.
CHRIS
It kind of is a musical!
LENA
You don't say...
CHRIS
Yeah, Delta blues, mostly; and, also Irish folk music.
LENA
Is it set in Ireland?
CHRIS
No, It's not. And the villain is an Irish vampire.
LENA
An Irish vampire? Is that a thing?
CHRIS
I guess it is now.* But here's the real thing: the Irish vampire and the folk music he sings in the movie--
LENA
There's a singing Irish vampire in this picture?
CHRIS
Yes. And it's like all anyone can talk about. My phone is flooded with articles basically all posing the same question--
LENA
Your phone?
CHRIS
Just go with it.
LENA
What's the question?
CHRIS
Basically the question is: "Why is there so much Irish music in this movie set in the Mississippi delta in 1932?"
LENA
Seems like a good question. And a logical one. What was the answer?
CHRIS
Well, the writer, director when asked about this rather startling element of his picture responded that he's "obsessed" with Irish folk music; as well as his kids; and that his first name is Irish.
LENA
What's his first name?
CHRIS
Ryan.
LENA
Is he Irish?
CHRIS
Well, he's African-American...so I'm gonna have to go with "no" on that. His last name is Coogler, which also sounds kind of Irish.
LENA
Is he wearing a scarf?
CHRIS
Yes. I think it has some connection to one of his movies.
LENA
Is that Hermes?
CHRIS
I don't know.
LENA
Love an Hermes scarf!
CHRIS
Who doesn't?
LENA
Most of the men I know, that's who.
CHRIS
Times have changed a bit Lena. Men now wear a lot of things that were formerly thought of as ultra feminine.
LENA
Such as?
CHRIS
Brooches. Skirts are making real inroads. Handbags...well, the jury's still out on that one.
LENA
Brooches?
CHRIS
Yes! That's the one that's gotten the most traction, believe it or not.
Is he wearing a scarf?
CHRIS
Yes. I think it has some connection to one of his movies.
LENA
Is that Hermes?
CHRIS
I don't know.
LENA
Love an Hermes scarf!
CHRIS
Who doesn't?
LENA
Most of the men I know, that's who.
CHRIS
Times have changed a bit Lena. Men now wear a lot of things that were formerly thought of as ultra feminine.
LENA
Such as?
CHRIS
Brooches. Skirts are making real inroads. Handbags...well, the jury's still out on that one.
LENA
Brooches?
CHRIS
Yes! That's the one that's gotten the most traction, believe it or not.
LENA
Who is that? He looks familiar.
CHRIS
That's Adrien Brody. He just won his second Best Actor Oscar.
LENA
Oh, he was in that Summer of Sam movie a while back. What do you think of his nose?
CHRIS
I don't know about you Miss Lena, but it gets me all hot and bothered and slightly vaporfied, I do declare!
LENA
Cicely warned me you were a tad on the...light...side. And that you have a tendency to see this sort of thing lurking everywhere.
CHRIS
She's right on with the light; but I don't see this stuff lurking everywhere. But I do see it. And when I see it, I'll point it out. In all seriousness, I do not want to be seen as The Writer Who Cried Wolf. And I am completely transparent about being corrected on anything I--shall we say--entertain. If I'm wrong, tell me how I'm wrong. Or just ignore me. Because if I don't say anything, nobody else is gonna. I'll point it out and if you disagree; tell me about it. Or don't. And we'll all go on our merry way. But I will say this: I get thousands of page views on my blogs a day. So, somebody is looking at my shit.
LENA
I eschew strong language, Mr. Reidy.
CHRIS
Please, call me Chris.
LENA
How 'bout "Chrissy"?
CHRIS
Sure. Love it!
LENA
Okay. So, Chrissy...we know what Sinners is about. What is your lil' ole story about?
CHRIS
It's about two macho fighters who get recruited into a new sport.
LENA
A new sport?
CHRIS
Yes. It's sort of martial arts in the air.
LENA
In the air?
CHRIS
Yes. They fight for points while skydiving inside an indoor chamber. It's called Lani-Batali. I made it up.
LENA
Is it like Jai-alai?
CHRIS
Not really. They both have kinds of sticks involved(!) and the names were intentionally similar. And then they fall in love.
LENA
Who falls in love?
CHRIS
The two men; one of whom is Irish and the other who is Irish-American.
LENA
The two men fall in love? Heavens to murgatroid!
CHRIS
We occasionally do get a mainstream movie about two men falling in love. But they're few and far between.
LENA
They're not brothers, I hope...
CHRIS
Interestingly the story has two sets of brothers and a father and son combo. But the two lovers are not brothers. That's kind of gross. Say, Lena, I was doing a bit of research on you. I was wondering if you ever sang any traditional Irish songs. Apparently, you haven't. But the computer told me about some song you sang about Irish folks and the downtrodden or something; but I can't find anything about it. But I do think I found the next best thing!
Who is that? He looks familiar.
CHRIS
That's Adrien Brody. He just won his second Best Actor Oscar.
LENA
Oh, he was in that Summer of Sam movie a while back. What do you think of his nose?
CHRIS
I don't know about you Miss Lena, but it gets me all hot and bothered and slightly vaporfied, I do declare!
LENA
Cicely warned me you were a tad on the...light...side. And that you have a tendency to see this sort of thing lurking everywhere.
CHRIS
She's right on with the light; but I don't see this stuff lurking everywhere. But I do see it. And when I see it, I'll point it out. In all seriousness, I do not want to be seen as The Writer Who Cried Wolf. And I am completely transparent about being corrected on anything I--shall we say--entertain. If I'm wrong, tell me how I'm wrong. Or just ignore me. Because if I don't say anything, nobody else is gonna. I'll point it out and if you disagree; tell me about it. Or don't. And we'll all go on our merry way. But I will say this: I get thousands of page views on my blogs a day. So, somebody is looking at my shit.
LENA
I eschew strong language, Mr. Reidy.
CHRIS
Please, call me Chris.
LENA
How 'bout "Chrissy"?
CHRIS
Sure. Love it!
LENA
Okay. So, Chrissy...we know what Sinners is about. What is your lil' ole story about?
CHRIS
It's about two macho fighters who get recruited into a new sport.
LENA
A new sport?
CHRIS
Yes. It's sort of martial arts in the air.
LENA
In the air?
CHRIS
Yes. They fight for points while skydiving inside an indoor chamber. It's called Lani-Batali. I made it up.
LENA
Is it like Jai-alai?
CHRIS
Not really. They both have kinds of sticks involved(!) and the names were intentionally similar. And then they fall in love.
LENA
Who falls in love?
CHRIS
The two men; one of whom is Irish and the other who is Irish-American.
LENA
The two men fall in love? Heavens to murgatroid!
CHRIS
We occasionally do get a mainstream movie about two men falling in love. But they're few and far between.
LENA
They're not brothers, I hope...
CHRIS
Interestingly the story has two sets of brothers and a father and son combo. But the two lovers are not brothers. That's kind of gross. Say, Lena, I was doing a bit of research on you. I was wondering if you ever sang any traditional Irish songs. Apparently, you haven't. But the computer told me about some song you sang about Irish folks and the downtrodden or something; but I can't find anything about it. But I do think I found the next best thing!
LENA
Oh honey, you'd have to be really downtrodden to drink that horse-piss.
CHRIS
Or a hipster.
LENA
Get outta here.
CHRIS
Seriously. It's had a resurgence with hipsters.
Oh honey, you'd have to be really downtrodden to drink that horse-piss.
CHRIS
Or a hipster.
LENA
Get outta here.
CHRIS
Seriously. It's had a resurgence with hipsters.
MAN'S VOICE WITH IRISH BROGUE
Did I hear mention of beer nearby?
CHRIS
Ladies and gentlehumans; please put your hands together for Mr. Lucky the Leprechaun!
WILD APPLAUSE!
Did I hear mention of beer nearby?
CHRIS
Ladies and gentlehumans; please put your hands together for Mr. Lucky the Leprechaun!
WILD APPLAUSE!
CHRIS
That was terrific Lucky!
LUCKY
Tank you. I'm exploring new avenues of creativity. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to take my true human form.
CHRIS
Please. However you feel most comfortable.
A GREEN FLASH / A SHOWER OF GREEN CLOVER, YELLOW STARS, BLUE DIAMONDS and PINK HEARTS
That was terrific Lucky!
LUCKY
Tank you. I'm exploring new avenues of creativity. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to take my true human form.
CHRIS
Please. However you feel most comfortable.
A GREEN FLASH / A SHOWER OF GREEN CLOVER, YELLOW STARS, BLUE DIAMONDS and PINK HEARTS
LENA
Works for Miss Lena.
CHRIS
Now, I would ask if the carpet matches the drapes; but I don't see drapes; or a carpet!
LUCKY
The wearin' o' the green; or the wearin' o' the red? Lucky'll never tell! Now, where is this beer I heard tell of? And don't be offerin' me no Schaefer.
CHRIS
In the spirit of multi-culti inclusion and to not forgettin' that this great land is a meltin' pot o' gold; barkeep, a round of Tsingtao for everyone!
Works for Miss Lena.
CHRIS
Now, I would ask if the carpet matches the drapes; but I don't see drapes; or a carpet!
LUCKY
The wearin' o' the green; or the wearin' o' the red? Lucky'll never tell! Now, where is this beer I heard tell of? And don't be offerin' me no Schaefer.
CHRIS
In the spirit of multi-culti inclusion and to not forgettin' that this great land is a meltin' pot o' gold; barkeep, a round of Tsingtao for everyone!
LENA
Mmmmm! This is good. I didn't know they had Chinese beer.
LUCKY
Ganbei!
ALL
GANBEI!
LUCKY
Now, is it true dat I heard you were talkin' about Irish vampires?
CHRIS
Yeah.
LUCKY
Is dat a ting?
CHRIS
I guess it is now...
*
Mmmmm! This is good. I didn't know they had Chinese beer.
LUCKY
Ganbei!
ALL
GANBEI!
LUCKY
Now, is it true dat I heard you were talkin' about Irish vampires?
CHRIS
Yeah.
LUCKY
Is dat a ting?
CHRIS
I guess it is now...
*
CHRIS
Hey y'all, it's an open bar. I gotta run right now; but we'll pick this back up soon! Ciao babies!
SFX: PHONE RINGS
Hey y'all, it's an open bar. I gotta run right now; but we'll pick this back up soon! Ciao babies!
SFX: PHONE RINGS
Miss Horne picks up the phone.
LENA
Hello?
CHRIS
(V/O throughout) Hi Lena, it's Chrissy!
LENA
Well as I live and breathe! Chrissy darlin' Where on Earth are you?
CHRIS
I'm calling from beautiful Surprise, Arizona in the heart of Maricopa County!
LENA
Why?
CHRIS
Because that's where I am.
LENA
Lucky wants me to put you on speaker.
CHRIS
Sure! Hey Lucky!
LUCKY
Hello there Mister Chris!
CHRIS
Are you guys having fun?
LUCKY
As long as this bar stays open, sure! But of course I can conjure up me own brew anytime I want. Speakin' o' which, would you like to try me proprietary blend of frosted oat and marshmallow lager?
CHRIS
Can you magically zap one through the Ethernet?
LUCKY
Sure and I can! Here it comes!
MAGICAL SPARKLE SOUND EFFECT
LENA
Hello?
CHRIS
(V/O throughout) Hi Lena, it's Chrissy!
LENA
Well as I live and breathe! Chrissy darlin' Where on Earth are you?
CHRIS
I'm calling from beautiful Surprise, Arizona in the heart of Maricopa County!
LENA
Why?
CHRIS
Because that's where I am.
LENA
Lucky wants me to put you on speaker.
CHRIS
Sure! Hey Lucky!
LUCKY
Hello there Mister Chris!
CHRIS
Are you guys having fun?
LUCKY
As long as this bar stays open, sure! But of course I can conjure up me own brew anytime I want. Speakin' o' which, would you like to try me proprietary blend of frosted oat and marshmallow lager?
CHRIS
Can you magically zap one through the Ethernet?
LUCKY
Sure and I can! Here it comes!
MAGICAL SPARKLE SOUND EFFECT
CHRIS
Mmmmmm...this is delicious lucky! I daresay magically delicious. What do you think Ms. Horne?
LENA
Oh baby, I'm enjoying my bourbon right now. Neat. But I'll take your word for it.
CHRIS
Say, Lucky: I know you're a leprechaun; but are you also a fairy?
LUCKY
No. I'm straight.
CHRIS
Really?
LUCKY
No...I'm just playing with you! I'm what you call polyamorouslymultipositionally-powerbottomally-hermaphrolicious.
LENA
Heavens to murgatroid!
CHRIS
Is that part or the LGBTQ+ acronym?
LUCKY
I suppose so. In fairyland it's LGBTQIAPAMPPBH+PB&J.
LENA
That's a mouthful.
LUCKY
And you took the words right out of my mouth, love!
LAUGHTER
LUCKY
So Mr. Chris, Miss Horne was telling me about this movie you were talking about; and that it has vampires from the old sod? Now, it dat a ting?
CHRIS
I'm not sure Lucky. I was hoping you could tell me. The opening of the movie mentions some kind of supernatural Irish beings but I can't recall what they were called...
Mmmmmm...this is delicious lucky! I daresay magically delicious. What do you think Ms. Horne?
LENA
Oh baby, I'm enjoying my bourbon right now. Neat. But I'll take your word for it.
CHRIS
Say, Lucky: I know you're a leprechaun; but are you also a fairy?
LUCKY
No. I'm straight.
CHRIS
Really?
LUCKY
No...I'm just playing with you! I'm what you call polyamorouslymultipositionally-powerbottomally-hermaphrolicious.
LENA
Heavens to murgatroid!
CHRIS
Is that part or the LGBTQ+ acronym?
LUCKY
I suppose so. In fairyland it's LGBTQIAPAMPPBH+PB&J.
LENA
That's a mouthful.
LUCKY
And you took the words right out of my mouth, love!
LAUGHTER
LUCKY
So Mr. Chris, Miss Horne was telling me about this movie you were talking about; and that it has vampires from the old sod? Now, it dat a ting?
CHRIS
I'm not sure Lucky. I was hoping you could tell me. The opening of the movie mentions some kind of supernatural Irish beings but I can't recall what they were called...
Property of Warner Bros. Pictures(?) via Tik-Tok
LUCKY
Hold dat taught; I'll ask me phone...
Hold dat taught; I'll ask me phone...
CHRIS
Any luck?
LUCKY
Well, did you know that Mr. Bram Stoker, the author of what can be considered the Bible of vampire books, is an Irishman?
CHRIS
I did know that. But Count Dracula is famously from Transylvania; and that book is set mostly in England.
LUCKY
Yes; but Stoker always was a proud Irishman. He probably set in England to make it more, shall we say, saleable. So the bastard was shrewd too!
LENA
Gotta butter that potato baby!
LUCKY
Don't you know it. But Stroker probably got the idea from this:
Any luck?
LUCKY
Well, did you know that Mr. Bram Stoker, the author of what can be considered the Bible of vampire books, is an Irishman?
CHRIS
I did know that. But Count Dracula is famously from Transylvania; and that book is set mostly in England.
LUCKY
Yes; but Stoker always was a proud Irishman. He probably set in England to make it more, shall we say, saleable. So the bastard was shrewd too!
LENA
Gotta butter that potato baby!
LUCKY
Don't you know it. But Stroker probably got the idea from this:
LENA
So the Irish vampire is a thing. Now, is "abhartach" what they're referred to as in Mr. Coogler's movie?
CHRIS
I don't know. And I'm sure it's pronounced nothing like how it's written.
LUCKY
Don't look at me...I'll never say it's name! (Crosses himself) In the name of Jesus, Mary, Saint Joseph and Saint Patrick!
LENA
I think we're getting off track Chrissy. I mean, I'd be surprised if you had Irish vampires flying around in your gay ole' Jai-alai story. I mean...do you?
CHRIS
No; but you know; there's a scene in Sinners where the Irish vampire flies into the air.
LENA
Is that one of the comparisons you were going to draw; as you mentioned earlier? One of these queries for Mr. Coogler? Because if you're going to do that, I think you better break it down for us.
LUCKY
Miss Lena is right Mr. Christopher. I mean, I'm all about the mercurial; but I'm afraid we're going to need some evidence that's a wee bit harder.
PAUSE
ALL
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!
LAUGHTER
CHRIS
You're right gang. So let me gather my "taughts" and we'll pick this up later.
ALL
(Raising drinks)
LENA
But Chrissy, you're on the phone.
CHRIS
Just go with it...
Slainte!
CFR 4/25/25
Please see: TROUBLIN' PART 2: QUERIES AND THEORIES
So the Irish vampire is a thing. Now, is "abhartach" what they're referred to as in Mr. Coogler's movie?
CHRIS
I don't know. And I'm sure it's pronounced nothing like how it's written.
LUCKY
Don't look at me...I'll never say it's name! (Crosses himself) In the name of Jesus, Mary, Saint Joseph and Saint Patrick!
LENA
I think we're getting off track Chrissy. I mean, I'd be surprised if you had Irish vampires flying around in your gay ole' Jai-alai story. I mean...do you?
CHRIS
No; but you know; there's a scene in Sinners where the Irish vampire flies into the air.
LENA
Is that one of the comparisons you were going to draw; as you mentioned earlier? One of these queries for Mr. Coogler? Because if you're going to do that, I think you better break it down for us.
LUCKY
Miss Lena is right Mr. Christopher. I mean, I'm all about the mercurial; but I'm afraid we're going to need some evidence that's a wee bit harder.
PAUSE
ALL
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!
LAUGHTER
CHRIS
You're right gang. So let me gather my "taughts" and we'll pick this up later.
ALL
(Raising drinks)
LENA
But Chrissy, you're on the phone.
CHRIS
Just go with it...
Slainte!
CFR 4/25/25
Please see: TROUBLIN' PART 2: QUERIES AND THEORIES