Hhhheeeyyy is an artisanal blend of fragrance notes and pheremones blended in France, where they don't bathe or wear deodorant; and Matt likes that! He oversaw the entire process of creating Hhhheeeyyy from its unique notes to its sweaty bottle (yes, the bottle sweats (see instruction booklet).*** But please do not apply Hhhheeeyyy to the underarm area unless you can handle the ultimate effects of Hhhheeeyyy****
Hhhheeeyyy starts with topnotes of seaspray, desert dust and Texas toast. Then Hhhheeeyyy moves into midnotes of cherry blossom, beaver musk and patchouli. When it settles into into its basenotes of diaphoresis, sativa rosin, cinnamon Dentyne, McConaughascent(TM/Patent Pending) and Lincoln Backseat Leather you'll know you've arrived. Arrived at that special place that words simply can't describe: McConaughavannah.
*The makers of Hhhheeeyyy and Mr. McConaughey are not responsible for shark, dik-dik or orangutan attack. Hhhheeeyyy may induce hyperactivity in hamsters.
**also: any pronoun e.g.: watakushi
***Instruction book sold separately for legal reasons.
****Hhhheeeyyy may cause permanent underarm hair loss. Opposite results may also occur; sometimes simultaneously. Discontinuing use of Hhhheeeyyy, once started, is not recommended. Starting use of Hhhheeeyyy requires online tutorial and signature.*****
*****(Don't you hate asterisks that have no corresponding note?)
##1 ml. per oz. Your mileage may vary.
Note: This is a parody. Actually, I think I would enjoy sniffing Mr. McConaughey; if only to see what all the fuss is about. CR